kewlgurl & Mircea PG-13

[Castiel]

Get out before you do more damage then you need to, Malphas urged himself. He knew better to turn around, for the cold and annoyed look on his face wasn't going to in any way help Nate. Hopefully, he'd be smart and realize that it wasn't truly himself acting. Didn't he already explain it multiple times? Certainly Nathan could figure it out. Malphas for one, was ready to return as soon as possible and apologize to the Nephilim. Perhaps Nathaniel would finally realize what kind of demon Malphas was. Though what was really bothering Malphas at the moment...was the satisfaction that he felt. It was one that he was familiar with, considering the amount of other people whose lives he had meddled with. But to do the same for Nathan...maybe there wasn't as much hope as Malphas believed.

Malphas was well aware that the other Nephilim were pursuing him, though they didn't seem to keen on a fight. As long as the demon was out of their home, they were good. Self-hatred was an emotion that burned out the rest. The walk short walk he took to get outside the door felt like a century. Longer than he himself had lived for. When he was a couple dozen meters away from the Institute, Malphas turned around briefly, casting a long, blank look at Nate's window before turning around and leaving. Tomorrow, he promised himself, after I get all of this out of my system. For right now, Malphas needed one thing. He needed to feed the needy demon that existed with him, which generally included killing things. The thought was pleasing, Malphas would definitely feel better after some of that.

[Mircea]

The rest of the night was horrible. Because, of course instead of letting him sleep, especially Sean wanted to discuss recent events. There were a lot of nasty words said, tears swallowed angrily and Nathan hated every second of it. "I was trying to help!" "Yeah, you certainly were. By doing what exactly?" the older one got up and in a desperate annoyed manner Nate let himself fall back onto the bed while he listened to words he'd already hurt in a similar manner before.
"I don't understand, Nathan. How can one be so naive?! Haven't we taught you that Fallens are dangerous? Treacherous? Foul and wrong?" There was no longer a word of protest. But Nathan didn't speak. In fact, he had barely spoken at all in the past two hours since Malphas had left. He simply nodded although he very much disagreed. Something inside him really didn't want to believe that those were truly Malphas' words, that it was what he had meant - and yet, every syllable burned on his tongue and made him cringe. If that had really been the demon speaking, why hasn't he said a single word to the others? Will he still come back? Nonsense! He promised to stay as well and couldn't wait for you to sort things out. He's gone. He's NOT! Nathan sighed shakily and rolled onto his side, carefully still watching Sean, all angry and preaching about horrendous Fallens and justified anger about their behaviour, but in fact he was busy with his own nagging thoughts, some hurtful, others speaking with the low and weak voice of hope.
It was Eve, who then liberated him, long hours later, from Sean's endless rants. "The boy needs sleep, Sean." she whispered. "We're not through with that yet, Nathaniel!" the shadowhunter threatened. Nathan had to suppress a sob when the door fell shut behind them. Nathaniel. It had sounded so much more beautifully when Malphas had said it. Wonderful, horrible Malphas. "He promised to come back", Nathan repeated to himself. Promised. Promised!

He fell asleep very late. That is, if one could call the following desaster 'sleep'. There were nightmares and a general feeling of being unwell, there was regret and disgust, hope and despair in his dreams. Yet the shadowhunter was wide awake at already half past six in the morning, barely before sunrise. Getting showered and dressed, doing his best to wash away the awful memories of nightmares and events that still made his heart heavy and bitter. But Malphas had promised to come back and the hope that the Fallen would keep his word just wouldn't want to die. And there Nathan was, sitting on a bench nearby the Institute, freezing a bit for the morning air was cool and impatiently waited for the Fallen to return. He had promised after all...

[Castiel]

Within two hours, Malphas was covered in blood and as satisfied as he could ever be. This time, he didn`t worry about the any problems the future could bring. He wanted to go back and apologize to Nathan, tell him that it wasn`t really his fault – But would that be a lie? Malphas may not have been completely himself at the moment, but even now, he had enjoyed thinking of the many lives he had torn apart. How was Nathaniel different? What the female Shadowhunter had mentioned was still pressing on his mind. If that was the only reason that Nate was kind to him…. Malphas simply didn’t know what to think of it.
By the time Malphas had finished his long and tiring walk to the Institute, all the blood on him had dried, and it was just a quarter past six. No way could Nathan be up now, especially with the events of last night. Even with the simple lack of sleep, this was an unearthly hour to be awake at. Malphas would likely sit around for a couple of hours and ponder about things to himself. Thinking about the terrible person he was, and how Nate would be doing at the moment.
To his greatest surprise, Nate walked out the door in no more than half an hour. Malphas jerked up from his sitting position, and took half a step forward before halting himself. He still didn’t know what Nathan thought of him now. What would Malphas do if Nathan already lost faith in him… and made a move to attack? All he could do was say a few measly words. “Nathaniel? I’m back.” He murmured, voice a slight bit colder and hard then he had intended them to be.

[Mircea]

When he noticed Malphas already waiting, Nate's heart jumped and a joyful smile appeared on his face. He did come back! His steps towards the Fallen were light and quick, yet he didn't dare to run. But he looked horrible! "Is that your blood?!" Worry clouded Nathan's happiness and - anger. It suddenly rushed through him, now that the tension had been taking from him, now that he didn't have to worry about his angel coming back. And there was still a cold undertone in Malphas' voice that only made Nathan even more upset. What had he ever done wrong?! He'd been trying to help, damnit! His fist hit Malphas' shoulder and the shadowhunter's voice trembled with emotion. There was more than just pure anger: worry and despair, disappointment and irritation - and yes, even delight that the Fallen Angel seemed to be just fine.

"You promised to stay!" What a weak reproach, considering how Malphas treated him, right now and some hours ago. Stupid like a fool, naiv like a child, useful like a tool and annoying like a burden. "I was trying to help! And you... you couldn't even appreciate it!" His voice broke and Nathan swallowed down tears that were already coming to his eyes again, sleepdeprivation burning in them. "You're effing lucky I am as naive and foolish as all of you make me to be or else I would- I would..." He lacked words and ideas and probably even hate. He had none of it and noticed he didn't even know what to feel. Nathan was torn between joy over Malphas' return and despite about his words and tone.

When he looked up again, he had blinked the tears away and failed awfully at imitating the Fallen's hard look. Instead there was defeat, helpless despair and honest curiosity. "What did you even come back for?"

[Castiel]

Clearly Malphas had still been too harsh for Nate's liking. He swore silently in his head, unsure of how he could mend the gaps he'd opened so wide. "It's... not my blood," he said softly, a smile twitching slightly on his face. Nathaniel could very well hate him now... and what if Malphas couldn't earn the Shadowhunter's forgiveness? It was just about the worst thing he could imagine at the moment. "I know I promised to stay Nathaniel, but I couldn't control myself. If I had stayed any longer someone could be dead-" Malphas stopped himself. "Oh wait, you don't want to hear my excuses do you?" He snapped, a flare of annoyance rising. He immediately dragged it down, if he were to continue his bad attitude towards Nathan... things could get ugly.

"Nathaniel," Malphas said sternly, "I don't want to hear that from you again ok? I appreciated every single thing you offered me, and sure you're naive, but not foolish," he assured him. Malphas had to calm himself down from the annoyance he felt. He was coming here to apologize, and obviously, he was just far too much of a terrible person for such a thing to be possible. Malphas forced the thought away yet again. Nathan only deserved the best of him. "I came back for you, Nathan."

[Mircea]

Someone could be dead - Nathan didn't believe it or he didn't care but whatever the case, he just sneered scornfully. As if! "So you just chose to offend me instead and presented me as a carefree idiot, unable to help or worth of your trust!" It was no question, neither was it a reproach. It was a statement, an angry one, yes. But still a statement. Actually... maybe it was a reproach as well. And a hidden question. After all, Nate still didn't know what to make of the things Malphas had said. The tone he had used and was using now. He shook his head. "No, I don't. No excuses. I want to hear that you didn't mean it. That it was the demon speaking or just said in the heat of the moment or whatever- I don't know, really. Just something like that... please?" It was really something he needed to hear right now, soemthing he had wanted to hear from Malphas the moment Nathan had had time enough to himself to give those disgusting words opportunity to haunt him. And they still hurt!

"Naive is not much better, now is it? It's just a less harmless version of foolish." He shook his head, his voice low. Somehow Malphas' words were not enough. And they didn't actually make sense. Why had he called the nephilim a fool? Repulsive even! Nathan couldn't make a connection and it was driving him mad that Malphas seemed so interchanged! He couldn't quite wrap his head around it. However, it were Malphas' last words that made Nathan's anger disappear. I came back for you, Nathan. The smile reappeared on his lips, shy and weak, yet clearly visible. Nathan took a step towards him and simply pulled the Fallen into a hearted hug, held him close for just a moment. "You're a horrible friend, has anyone ever told you that?" he said, still close to him, with a cheeky smile and then took a step back again, his smile growing more confident now.

[Castiel]

Malphas could barely breath. Lucky for him, a long time without breathing would tire him out, but it wasn't something necessary. It was like sleep to a mortal. "Those are all excuses," he said darkly, voice slowly retreating to the bitter voice that he often spoke with. "I've told you already, Nathaniel. It's not so much of a demon inside me as it is me becoming one. So I won't tell you that. After all, I'm just pure evil aren't I? I'm sorry that I can't tell you what you want to hear," Malphas said, a slight dry tone to his voice.

Malphas didn't even reacted to Nathan's hug, he let himself stand there, and and looking down at the Shadowhunter, he wondered how much damage he had actually done the previous night. "No one had to tell me that," Malphas said with a slight flinch, "I figured it out myself. Now if you're done putting up with me, I think I'll be leaving." He mused coldly, though there was a sorrowful look in his eyes, and a tempting smile. Malphas gazed at Nathan, wondering if there'd ever be a point where they weren't battling each other.

[Mircea]

"You're not lost", Nathan repeated once again but this time the words felt hollow. If even Malphas himself didn't want to believe anymore, how could he? The nephilim bit his lip, slightly shaking his head and lowering his gaze. What had happened? It didn't make any sense at all, Malphas had been so motivated, he had believed him that there was a chance to find a cure, at least to enjoy the time they - he - still had and now he was just so... distant. It was heartwrenching. The smile on his lips had disappeared again and given way to a pale and thin line of lips pressed together to not have false words escape his mouth. He was tired of convincing Malphas to stay when the Fallen was obviously desperate to leave and fall apart far away, all on his own, not giving a damn anymore about anything. "I was joking. You're not horrible, Malphas."

Apart from that he had come back for him, the Fallen had said it himself! Nathan figured that he gave his Fallen's words way too much weight, he certainly shouldn't cling onto them that much. But what else was there to hold on to?!
"Are you sure you don't want to stay?" he inquired cautiously, too intimidated to beg and yet couldn't hide that he very much wished for it. "We could go get ourselves coffee somewhere..." he offered and gave Malphas a look of his best puppy eyes. Just a coffee, Malphas. Why not, hm? Just give me that.

[Castiel]

When Malphas spoke again, his voice became slightly shaky. "I... I'm sorry Nathaniel. I know that you had faith in me. I did to... It's just that, you saw what I did back there. That was nothing. And I don't like seeing you be disappointed in me, or worry yourself over me," Malphas stopped for a moment. "You may have been joking, but it was the truth Nathan. Besides... if what that Shadowhunter said was true,I should really stay away from you," Malphas murmured, voice faltering at the last phrase. He hoped that the topic wouldn't be too harsh on Nathan. "But... coffee is fine," he said reluctantly, more out of his personal desire than Nate's.

[Mircea]

"What about those moments inbetween you going mental and me tearing up?" Nathan's words were low spoken, almost shy. He didn't even know for sure what those moments were worth to himself. Of course he had enjoyed the evening with the Fallen very much! And after all Malphas would surely get better - the shadowhunter was still determined to 'save' him, to cure him from the curse the Angels had put on him. And he would show that goddamn world that Fallens were not doomed to be those monsters everyone said them to be! "Well, they said a lot of things..." He cocked his head in a questioning manner, all puzzled about what Malphas was referring to. His fellows had said so many things, all of them offensive and angry, and when he remembered hiw they had led Malphas outside it came to his mind that they might have said a lot of other things Nate knew nothing about.

"Do you want me to get you a jacket? Or a fresh shirt, anything at all before we go?" He was still covered in blood after all and maybe felt uncomfortable like that. Nathan wanted to make sure that Malphas didn't feel any more uncomfortable as he did anyway when they'd only had such little time until the Fallen would once again decide that Nathan was better off without him anyway... "There's a really great coffee shop near the park. It's my favourite actually. Okay with you? Or too far?"