Why I'm sad and upset...

[Mythis]

This is why I've been inactive, or just not responsive as much as I used to be.


So, I've been super depressed for a few days. I won't lie, I've been crying every day, and I'm hurting on the inside. I rarely ever cry or show my emotions to other people but I hurt so bad I can't take it. There is this girl I met online over 6 years ago. We met, hung out all the time, she even moved here and lived with me for awhile. We were together all the time. Played games together, watched movies together, ate together. She was the greatest friend in the world to me, and I ended up falling in love with her. She was here for me when I was sad and alone and just needed help or a hug. She was really sweet to me, understanding of my short comings and problems, and never judged me. A few days ago she left... Told me she didn't want to see me again. The problem is, I don't know why, she won't tell me. She just up and left and won't come see me or stay a night just to talk things over. She was all I had and now that she's gone I have this huge void in my chest that I can't fill. I've talked to my family and it hasn't helped. I don't have RL friends... Internet friends somewhat help, but it's simply temporary and then I'm just a crying miserable mess all over again. I need a hug... a real hug from a person and have them tell me it's ok. But I can't seem to get that. I know I'll never see her again and it does break my heart. I'm crushed by it. I don't know what to do, or how to cope. I used to be able to turn to her and just hug her and cuddle in bed for a couple hours and the pain would be gone, but she isn't here for that. I just feel like I'm going to die... I feel so alone...


Now on top of that. I've lost my job awhile back. I have less than a month to find something that I can do with having bone problems. I have just enough food for a week or so, gas in my car to make it to a few job interviews, and enough clean clothes for a couple weeks. After that, I'm homeless. I'm literally about to lose everything. I've tried turning to my family for help and they are either too busy, too broke, or they just simply can't or don't want to. I've always been here for everyone when they needed me, and now I'm alone... It's painful and I just cry. That's all I can do at this point. Cry, pray, and hope a miracle happens...

[Sphye]

I'm so sorry to hear this, Mythis!

I think that a great step to take for emotional well-being would be to try to make some friends that you can see in real life. It can be hard to do that at first, especially if you're an introvert like many people online, but having someone to talk to and hang out with would help a lot.
If you want to make new friends, try hanging out in public places that you think people with similar interests might be. If you like reading, you could try hanging out at the library, talking to the librarians and other people there. Libraries also tend to have several different clubs and activities that you can look into to meet people.

My best advice for your financial situation is to apply to as many jobs as you can! I'm sure you've already been trying this, but it's the best thing I can think of for the situation. You shouldn't keep yourself from applying to a job because you think you won't be hired, because at least you raise your chances by applying at all!

Life moves on. Memories of people don't go away, but you don't stop making new memories, either. Just because there's been a change doesn't mean things will always be different. People adapt to different, even thriving after adjusting. You'll be alright. It's okay to be sad, but just remember that it won't be forever. You are strong enough for this.

If you ever need anyone to rant to, feel free to PM me. My inbox is always open for anyone who needs to use it. ^u^